Without you by my side
Wakin up with teary eyes,
I can't do this no more, gotta erase you now
So I think of all the pain you've given me
Try to look at all the damage you've done to me
No matter how hard I try,
I just can't figure out why
I keep thinking bout how sweet you used to be
Gave me 2 different tears
After all these years
Tears of joy, tears of pain
Like sunshine and rain
So I hate you
But the love you gave me was so so good
So I love you
But the pain you gave me was so so bad ...
what i have to say is sometimes i feel alone and no one understand me. yep, that's the point.
now let me ask you, (which is i know that no one will answer this) did you ever feel you love someone but instead he hurt you? or you love someone but he don't love you back? i guess maybe yes, you ever fell like that. but the point is now i'm afraid to open my heart back to a man. i'm afraid because i don't want hurt myself again. it's traumatic, you know. iya, gue trauma.
gue cuma gatau kenapa gue bisa begini, bisa kacau begini.
yang paling utama, yang paling gue butuhin saat gue begini adalah temen-temen gue, sahabat-sahabat gue. tapi gue tau mereka lagi sibuk sekarang mengejar impian masing-masing. i know my friends has their own problem, i just can't give them some of mine. so, i keep it for myself. dan gue pun sibuk sama kegiatan-kegiatan gue atau lebih tepatnya gue yang menenggelamkan diri dalam kesibukan ini buat ngelupain semuanya. huft.
i need someone to hug me, tell me everything is okay.
i wanna have someone that can understand me, love me like the way i am, care to me without any intention. is there someone out there? i guess not for this question.
huaaah it's hurt like a hell! it's hurt like d*mn thing! aaaaaaaa i wanna scream loud, you know!
rasanya gue mau meledak.
but i know that no one will hear me.
i don't know why i feel like this whereas yesterday i can control myself, i can control my emotion and i can through all this. whereas yesterday i can strongly through all this. but this time, i failed.
yeah, well, sh*t happen
berulang kali gue puter lagu Fergie 'Big Girl Don't Cry' nyampe gue blenek, nyampe hafal banget itu lagu. iya, gue berusaha buat diri ini kuat, buat menstimulasi otak gue sendiri kalo gue ga boleh cengeng
now when i feel like this, i need rain. why? because i can cry under the rain without worry that others will know i'm cry. kalo ujan ga akan ada yang sadar gue nangis
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| cry under the rain like this |
1 komentar:
don't worry when you read this post, ok? gue lagi pms and everything around me become 'suck' hehe so i write what i want to write. please don't worry. i'm okay. really :)
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